21 signs you have been too long in the Netherlands

OK, so the Netherlands is not Japan, the signs that tell you that you’ve been here for too long are not nearly as hilarious. I mean, you don’t find yourself nodding your head back to the newscaster at the beginning and end of a newscast after a few years in NL. But there are some curious, funny moments when you realize you’re turning more Dutch than the locals.

  1. You get annoyed by people calling the Netherlands Holland.
  2. On birthdays of the Royal family you raise the flag.
  3. These birthdays are marked along with birthdays of your friends and family on the birthday calendar hanging in your toilet.
  4. You own a caravan.
  5. When you go on vacation (in your caravan), you bring a 10 kg bag of potatoes, a few kilo’s of cheese and two jars of Calvé peanut butter.
  6. You’re looking forward to this year’s Camping and Caravan Fair.
  7. You can taste the difference between belegen and jong belegen cheese.
  8. Your kaasboer at the market knows your taste in cheese.
  9. When abroad, you get irritated when you don’t get a cookie with your coffee at a restaurant.
  10. To your horror you actually like beschuit met muisjes.
  11. When cycling, you can multitask – read a book, roll a cigarette or even make out with your girlfriend cycling next to you.
  12. You and your wife own 5 bicycles between the two of you (plus two for each child).
  13. You measure distances in minutes of cycling.
  14. You think a pancake is a perfectly normal dinner dish.
  15. You recognize which province someone is from by their accent.
  16. People can recognize which province you’re from by your accent.
  17. You know what VVE, BZN and GVD stand for.
  18. Rivers flowing above the surrounding landscape don’t freak you out anymore.
  19. You can’t remember when was the last time you smoked weed.
  20. You can have a conversation on any topic using only quotes of Johan Cruyff.
  21. You own a t-shirt that says “Hup Holland Hup!” (despite point number 1).

There may be more than 21 signs you’ve been in the Netherlands for too long. If you have some of your own signs you’ve been in NL (or anywhere else!) for too long, I’d love to hear.

This is where you spend the summer vacation

This is where you spend the summer vacation

 

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6 Comments

Filed under cycling

6 responses to “21 signs you have been too long in the Netherlands

  1. I love 18!!
    I remember the first time I drove on a highway NEXT TO the ocean. You could literally drive off the road onto the beach into the sea (if you so pleased). My eyeballs nearly fell out :p

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